Reflecting on the Wait

We received the last of the documents needed to hand the ball back over to C’s birth country last week and it is giving me ALL THE FEELS: thankful that the end of the process is upon us and moving quickly, anxious to meet C and bond with her and experience her birth country, longing to bring her forever home…

This part of the process has me reminiscing on the same feelings before Ruth came home. I remember seeing her pictures in updates and the ache in my heart to hold her and comfort her… I remember washing her clothes long before she came home and thinking, “I can’t wait until I’m washing these because she’s gotten dirty playing outside or eating lunch with us…” All the normal, every day things I enjoy with my family brings on the tug in my heart to have the one we’re waiting on included. It also gives me pause when I develop an ungrateful attitude towards those every day situations I used to long for. God quickly convicts my heart when I complain about changing wet bed sheets, treating stains on clothes or cleaning up spilled milk. He reminds me of the days before I had a daughter, and brings me humbly asking for more grace as I continue to parents the blessings he’s given me.

Ruth has been home for over two years, and I can hardly believe the time has gone that quickly, or that she hasn’t just ALWAYS been with us. It’s that weird dichotomy often experienced by parents. “The days sometimes drag, but the years fly by…” Or, something like that!

Here are some “selfies” Ruth took while we were visiting grandpa Haff in the hospital. She is such a fashion/beauty guru! And although that’s not her momma’s cup of tea, she’s just too pretty for me not to get sucked into her “poses and makeup.”


As we wait (sometimes, painful though it may be) I am reminded of God’s grace to us in Ruth’s life and the addition of her beautiful soul to our family, and I am at peace that soon C will be the exact same situation. It truly won’t be long and I will be changing her wet bed sheets, dressing her to go outside and play, brush her little teeth and wipe her little bottom! I’ll cling to that promise and remember these moments of longing for her to be home, no matter the cost…

We are expected to travel at the beginning of May, so that hasn’t changed! We’ve been asked about the coronavirus and it’s potential effect on our travels. While C isn’t technically in China or close to Wuhan where the virus originated, we will likely be traveling through China to get to her, and so we’re praying firstly that God’s mercy would be widespread and the virus eradicated, and also that it’s no longer a concern well before travel time. But, as in every step of this process, we will just continue to trust in his sovereignty. As far as I know, the family who was scheduled to travel this month to C’s country are still going, so even in the midst of the outbreak there isn’t a travel ban.

Continue to pray with us for C’s care and peace, and that God would prepare her sweet little heart for the transition that is coming. Pray for us as we prepare our family for her home coming, and that the process wouldn’t be delayed and we can finally hold that bundle of joy in our arms!